"
Breathe, keep breathing. Don't lose your nerve" -
Radiohead



Page 243: Aloofness

/ Saturday, August 31, 2013 /
Using aloofness as a shield to face this life seems like an option lately.

Considering that some situations and expectations brought nothing but incredulity.
Considering that trusting and or put hopes on people leads you into disillusionment, sometimes.
Considering that to oscillate between try to trust that your efforts will bring results eventually and facing failures constantly is exhausting.


"and at once I knew I was not magnificent"

Page 242: Pardon?

/ Saturday, August 24, 2013 /
Read this piece of an article posted by Jakarta Globe, and tell me...please tell me that I’m not the only one who thinks that the plan is totally ridiculous.

A plan by the Education Agency of Prabumulih, South Sumatra, to include virginity tests as part of its high school admission requirements has drawn the ire of legislators and education experts, who say that such an exam is a violation of personal space and an obstruction to a student’s right to an education.

H.M. Rasyid, the chief of Prabumulih’s Education Agency, told the Indonesian news portal kompas.com on Monday that increasing instances of premarital sex and prostitution among female students prompted the move.

“We’re planning on conducting virginity tests for senior high school students,” Rasyid said. “We have proposed it in the 2014 regional budget.”

Err…Pardon? What? Hah?
Sorry sir...but could you please explain it to me with some reliable research…what’s the correlation between morality and virginity?


O, and I also found an article about MUI agreed to that plan and encourages the government to make a policy about it because MUI thinks it prevents students from putridity. How about making a policy to prevent corruption and imbecility among politicians instead?

And why are you planning it only for FEMALE students?

Fuckin’ stupid misogynysts.

Page 241: A Sorta Fairytale

/ Saturday, August 17, 2013 /
"Music is the shorthand of emotion."

-Tolstoy-





 
Remind me of the good old days when i used to have that dream to be a great journalist.

Page 240: Bad News

/ Friday, August 16, 2013 /
Bloodshed in Egypt.
Rich people hunt lions in Africa just because they're filthy rich.
A mother got murdered because her daughter wore jeans.

Bad news.
Bad news.
More bad news.

I sucked and succumbed to every word in those articles. Every fragment of those scenes.
What a crazy world.
Wait...a bunch of crazy people.





Page 239: Tired Heart

/ /
There’s a vague image of you and I sitting on a beach from a dream I had long time ago; a dream that had triggered my stupidity and grew some kind of odd interest in you. I haven’t removed it, but the interest has gone. The hope, to be exact. You’d drawn a bold line, and I respected your wish not to cross it. Obey the rule without hesitation until now, if I may add. But don’t ask me to go to other space where you and I can have loads of fun as friends this soon.

That’s too much for my tired heart.

Tori Amos - Merman

Page 238: Elusive*

/ Monday, August 12, 2013 /
Those elusive feelings are written on crumpling invisible papers in the hearts of ours.

And through those papers they live.
They breathe.

We’ve been too busy to remind ourselves that we should’ve removed them long time ago.
But we didn't do anything.

Light up the fire,
my dear.

Burn them to ashes.
Let the wind scatters what have been ruined.

Tonight.  Tonight.


---

*a prose for my best friend, amoy. Haks :p

Page 237: Delicate Morsel

/ /
YOU WILL
ALWAYS BE
A GHOST 
FLICKERING BEHIND 
MY EYELIDS 
WHEN I SLEEP

Kriz from jktxnyc

One of the warmest yet saddest sentences i've read last week.

Page 236: YOUR LIFE IS A LIE

/ Sunday, August 11, 2013 /



"Nobody wins. Try not to cry. You'll survive. On your own." 

Yes, i can watch this bizarre yet cool video over and over again.

Page 235: A Postcard from the Big Durian

/ Saturday, August 10, 2013 /
Less traffic. Less crowd. Jakarta gets its annual rest when lotsa people who usually utilize it to make a living leave it for a while to enjoy the most celebrated and longest holiday in this country: Eid Mubarak. Some of them go to their hometowns. Some of them take trips to other cities. And knowing that this city finally gets a break it deserves from the “tortures” that come from the hands of its citizens, including me, somehow soothes me a bit. I don’t know why. But that fact soothes me a bit.

Sometimes when I hear a person says that s/he likes Jakarta, I easily assume that that person isn’t being sincere, perhaps even preparing for some cruel jokes about The Big Durian. The best reason for that is maybe because I see it from my own perspective. I’ve never really loved Jakarta, although I was born and raised in this city. Sometimes I like it, sometimes I don’t. But to say that I hate it could be a misleading statement as well, since that’s not how I feel, and Jakarta has been some kind of pond where I met people whom I like.

Whom I love.

Some of those people gathered with me to celebrate Eid Mubarak. Nothing of importance has changed, pretty much the same like last year. I was happy, but not ecstatically. It wasn’t vapid occasion, for sure. I felt such relief when I knew the festivity is over. Just like this “enticing” city, I needed a rest too. Probably I still need it for my emotional part, considering last month filled with lotsa suffocating shits. I need some kind of shield to ignore unnecessary stimulus that can lead me back in to that over-analyzing-my-life abyss. I’m building one.




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