Page 71: Maybe

Maybe it’s the way you wrote about your family and somehow I can see that you love them so much.
Maybe it’s the way you look at me at that rainy night. The night when I realized that the feeling for you was more than a crush, and I felt so stupid and anxious.
Maybe it’s the way you spontaneously dancing and jumping that night, when you heard the song from your favorite musicians.


Maybe it’s because you gave comment about my blackberry password that night; you thought it’s too long.
Maybe it’s the way you suddenly said some unnecessary details from what I’ve told you, and you’re started to act as if you’re afraid I would mistook it as some “signal” – because you remember some of my stories.
Maybe it’s because that awkward moment in that DVD store.
Maybe it’s because I found you curled up in fetal position that morning, right before you wake up.
Maybe it’s because your unimportant DM.
Maybe it’s because you wear those shoes.
Maybe that’s why it’s hard to get over you.


But…
Maybe you’re just being nice.
Maybe you see me as "just a friend".
Maybe all of those things I’ve wrote above, mean nothing to you.
Maybe I should stop. I should learn again how to let go and say "au revoir". I should learn not to waiting this long.


Because it starting to cause pain…

***

Got nothing new
Telling me, telling you
And the sky which was clear
It is no longer here

Don't know how
But that
Something extra delicious
Something sweet but nutritious
Something good
But I guess that we blew it
I mean I guess that we knew it
I mean I guess that we did

 (Oren Lavie - A Quarter Past Wonderful)