"
Breathe, keep breathing. Don't lose your nerve" -
Radiohead



Page 221: Flirting is Not My Thing. (Oooh... Shocker!)

/ Monday, April 15, 2013 /
Let’s get straight to the point. According to my observation, there are three types of people when it comes to flirting:
1. People who “blessed” with that ability to flirt with anyone, it doesn’t have to be with a person whom they like. As easy as 1, 2, 3.
2. People who can flirt to person they like, not every time, but frequently they can keep up with the game. They can handle their anxiety, they can manage to prevail, blablabla, in short, they finally can make a move.
3. People who get too nervous when someone they like is around and makes them…well, look like idiots or like cold-hearted bitches. They usually DON’T flirt back, don’t make a move, or even when they finally came up with something nice to say, it’s waaaaay toooo lateeee.

I’m one of those #3 people. I’m an idiot, an idiot that looks like a cold hearted bitch. I usually get nervous when I have a crush on a guy, and when he talks to me, I will automatically come up with something short, cold, straight answers that seem to prevent almost all possibilities for us to talk longer than 10 minutes.

The thing is, I don’t know why I usually do that kind of thing. If I like a guy and he’s interested in me and he has no patience, he would think that I might hate him. Haha. I’m pretty sure of that.

Men I dated usually have more patience, or curiosity, so I think it made them kept trying until I felt comfortable and…be myself: Adorable and amazing. Haha. Kidding. I mean I’m not that quiet, I can make people laugh and talk about interesting things.

I can give you some examples of my imbecility when I have a crush on a guy:

That guy: Can I hold your hand?
Possible answers:
a. Sure, you can hold other parts of my body if you want to.
b. O baby, you have all blessings to do that. As long as you want to.
c. Why not, you’ve already captivated my heart (corny! But hey, that’s the point of flirting right? You have to have that courage to say it).
Me:
Yeah.

That guy: I like your choice of music. I’ve been listening when blablabla
Possible answers:
a. Really? Just my music? *follow by seductive smile (P.S I actually don’t know how to do a great seductive smile either. Haha)
b. Which one? Do you want to get a copy? I can also give you some reference. We can do it (emphasizing on “do it”) in your place. Just you and me.
Me:
Oh, thanks.

That guy: Are you seeing someone?
Possible answers:
a. I’m seeing you now. (look straight into his eyes)
b. It depends, if you want to be that someone, I can easily remove the other someone I have right now.
c. No. Do you want to be that someone?
Me:
No.

That guy: What’s your type?
Possible answers:
a. *Describe him. So he will get the clue*
b. I’m staring at him right now *staring at him with flirtatious smile*
Me:
Well. Funny guy.

For your information, those examples REALLY happened. Pathetic, huh?

Cue laugh.
Banging my head on the wall.
Mixing vodka with shampoo.
Singing Skinny Love by Bon Iver.
Imagining naked Kit Harington in front of me.
But then he transforms into a giant purple orc.
Zzzzzzz.


And that’s a picture of me and my beloved friend Abbey when we’re not actually trying to look silly. (I looove this picture by the way.) We are facing the same situation now: guys whom we like seem to like other girls. Haha. But she can flirt better than me, definitely. :p
and that's Kit Harington! fo sho!

3 comments:

{ thefuturecrayon } on: April 26, 2013 at 3:17 PM said...

him: can i see your room?
her: yes, of course.

....
after checking the interior
....

her: so, see you around sometime.
him: *standing at the door to prolong the conversation* errr. blablabla. thanks for blablabla.
her: you're welcome *yawn* *closing the door* *waking up with regret*

{ hertiana dwi putri } on: April 28, 2013 at 12:54 PM said...

@futurecrayon: her = you, i assume :p

{ thefuturecrayon } on: April 29, 2013 at 9:04 AM said...

not tell ;p
maximum level of inability to digest the obvious.

 
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