Page 291: Birthday Trip to Gili

Bleeding knee and head full of wishes. It was midnight in Gili. 10 minutes before I accidentally hit a guy -- I blame it on that stupid bike, besides of course, my stupidity too. I turned 30 and I sat on the beach. In front of me were the dark water and the dark sky.

“Now what? What’s next?” said the voices inside my head. I didn't answer it, but I promised that I would keep chasing things that I think will make me a happier person. And to keep this tradition, too: having a birthday trip ever year, to remind myself that life is a journey, and as long as I’m breathing, I will do what I love and do things that make me feel alive.

This year, I decided to go to Gili. 4 days 3 nights. I took a fast boat from Bali (IDR350,000) and stayed at Denaya Lodge (500,000/ day).

Gili was amazing. I snorkeled (IDR100,000 a day), I rode bike (IDR70,000/ day), I saw a big turtle in the sea, I giggled uncontrollably when I saw crabs on the beach (no, i didn't consume the magic mushroom. I just thought that it's hilarious) and I had tons of fun with two amazing people. My life isn't perfect but I thank God for everything that I have and everyone in my life. Getting older doesn't mean that you have to let go of things that make you happy just because some people told you to do so. As long as it doesn't against the law, do it. Seriously, I think you should just do it. Do things that make you happy, learn things that can make you a wiser person, and be kind. People will say whatever they wanna say anyway so just live your life, because it's yours. Embrace, explore, enjoy. And again, thank you, everyone, for the birthday wishes and gifts. 

Page 235: A Postcard from the Big Durian

Less traffic. Less crowd. Jakarta gets its annual rest when lotsa people who usually utilize it to make a living leave it for a while to enjoy the most celebrated and longest holiday in this country: Eid Mubarak. Some of them go to their hometowns. Some of them take trips to other cities. And knowing that this city finally gets a break it deserves from the “tortures” that come from the hands of its citizens, including me, somehow soothes me a bit. I don’t know why. But that fact soothes me a bit.

Sometimes when I hear a person says that s/he likes Jakarta, I easily assume that that person isn’t being sincere, perhaps even preparing for some cruel jokes about The Big Durian. The best reason for that is maybe because I see it from my own perspective. I’ve never really loved Jakarta, although I was born and raised in this city. Sometimes I like it, sometimes I don’t. But to say that I hate it could be a misleading statement as well, since that’s not how I feel, and Jakarta has been some kind of pond where I met people whom I like.

Whom I love.

Some of those people gathered with me to celebrate Eid Mubarak. Nothing of importance has changed, pretty much the same like last year. I was happy, but not ecstatically. It wasn’t vapid occasion, for sure. I felt such relief when I knew the festivity is over. Just like this “enticing” city, I needed a rest too. Probably I still need it for my emotional part, considering last month filled with lotsa suffocating shits. I need some kind of shield to ignore unnecessary stimulus that can lead me back in to that over-analyzing-my-life abyss. I’m building one.