Breathe, keep breathing. Don't lose your nerve" -

Page 317: We Do Have That Culture, Indonesia

/ Thursday, May 5, 2016 /
Yuyun was 14 when she got raped by 14 men and murdered. This sick incident is the reason why we need to change the law in Indonesia and educate people about rape culture. Seriously, we DO have a rape culture problem.

My buddy Fely sent me the link of this thoughtful writing about Rape Culture in Indonesia.
Go read this so we can learn to stop blaming on things like alcohol or woman's body.

Dear Yuyun, I hope your soul is in the most peaceful place right now.

"But rape and sexual assault isn’t just because of alcohol. To blame it on the alcohol is to detract the perpetrator’s responsibility from their actions. And that epitomizes the flawed system we have which propagates a rape culture.

But no one ever taught boys to not do catcalls. In fact, our people prides on it. Most believe catcalls should be taken as a compliment to the women, and they should be flattered. So whenever sexual crimes occur, it’s the blame game again: what was the woman wearing? was she flirty? Why not blame it on the men? Because it’s simply more convenient and more culturally acceptable to blame the women."

Page 316: Fascinate

/ Monday, March 28, 2016 /
This will be over.
I promise this will be over soon.
The pain, the jealousy, the cheesy imagination in my head.
It will be over soon.

You've found a new home.
I should be happy.
I should.

Still, I wish I fascinated you at some point, 
in some particular way.

Page 315: All I have left is the story*

/ /
It’s kinda funny how Interpol’s songs are the salve that I need every time I decided to heal the wound and move on.
Every time I realized that the ship has sailed.

Despite the sexual innuendos in their lyrics, Paul Banks seems to know how to represent how I feel inside when it comes to letting go. Or to comprehend how weary souls try to deal with all “bad lucks” they have.

Anyway, guess it’s the sign I need to continue chasing my dreams. No pause this time, Neng Tia. 
No pause.

I know Carlos D has left, but for me, this is interpol.

*from The Depths

Page 314: [Not] Brave Enough

/ Thursday, March 24, 2016 /

She told me to gather the courage that I once had, to be brave once again.
Be brave enough to break my own heart.
I think I did. Or you did.
You didn’t mean to. But you did break it.
Rejection doesn’t always come in a form of a word “no”, right?
She encouraged me to confess to you.
And I refused. 
Because some part of me believes that you knew I’m kinda into you.
And some part of me believes that even if you feel a little bit of attraction, you wouldn’t nurture it. Why would you? You have her. And it seems simpler to be with her. And you seem happier. You adore her.
Why wouldn't you? She seems amazing. I envy her. I do.

I loved the feeling when you touched my scar.

Page 313: Once Again

/ Monday, March 21, 2016 /
once again
you threw
your little 
tired heart
to a person
who refused

to catch it.

image courtesy: battery_full

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